Sometimes we are let down by people we never thought would. We learn that people do NOT take care of things that they'd otherwise be obligated to. Sometimes it's harder to separate, to remove their presences from our lives, than it is to sit and endure how they treat us.
It is not about us. It's not about what we lack, or what we couldn't give them. It's about them. In the end it always is. Never let them make you think otherwise. But this isn't to say that it is all their fault. Sometimes that's just how people are and it's a tough lesson to learn but one way or another, in your life, you will learn it.
I'm sorry that you have to learn it now and at the hands of the one who helped bring you onto this earth but you were created only with the permission and allowance of someone who will love you endlessly. I know, from personal experience, that it is hard to "feel" that endless and selfless love from Him while we are being battered down by everyone around us but in the end, He is all that remains. And it is not. His. Fault.
There will come points in your life where there will be no easy answer. Where any path that you take, no matter how much you try, will be painful and it will try you until you feel you have nothing left. But only when we are empty can we be Filled with something so much better. Something... someone who will carry us to the ends of the earth if only we allow it.
Don't hate him. Don't blame him. Don't use him as your excuse to fail but as your grateful reason to succeed and carry on. Pray for him. Pray that he will find happiness and peace despite how much pain he causes you.
Don't compare. I once heard, on here actually, that "comparison is poison". It will only disappoint you and there's no need to disappoint yourself when there are others to do it for you, right? Don't add to that poison with your own unproductive thinking. Don't relish in hating him. Don't relish in the crimes that he has committed against you.
Do you know what mom always told me? Don't. Let. Them. Win. Misery loves company. This is so absolutely true. Pick yourself up. Pick yourself up and be happy with who you are. Not boastful, not condemning on others, but happy with who you are, accepting of who you are and grow. With His guidance. Never become complacent in your relationship with Him. Always grow, always learn, always Listen.
Love you for the value He places in you, not the value that the world or even your friends and family place in you because next to Him, our love for you is so minimal. Love you for your flaws and for your strengths, love others for their flaws and their strengths. Mom also preached, up and down, treat others the way that you want to be treated. But even better. When someone spits in your face, smile and bless them. Pray for them. I know this is the hardest thing to do. The anger is so much easier. The resentment is so much easier but in the end it will only tear you down to the inner most parts of your being, not them. Love yourself but do not become consumed by your self.
But He doesn't say to love ourselves first, we must love those around us. Give to others first before we give to ourselves. But don't force yourself on someone who will not accept you, who has continuously denied you. You can storm Heaven with your prayers for him but you don't have to allow him to be a part of your life or vice versa. It is possible.
And don't hold what he has done to you against anyone else, especially other men. Don't ever listen to, "they're all the same". This couldn't be a bigger lie. Weed out the good and the bad (for you) by their own actions, not by the actions of others. No one whom we meet on our path is an accident.
Comments (1)
Good words, excellent advice.